Boldness, a unique masculine quality

There is one special masculine quality women love above all, which is doing magic for the men who possess it. That quality is what you could call masculine boldness.

This is the character of a man who smoothly, relentlessly and aggressively pursue sex with a woman he likes. Moreover, he does it in a sexually confident way, that is, without any fear of a negative outcome, and without shame for his physical desire.

A note at this point: I insist on the word “smoothly”, because at no time does the man really forces himself on her. Aggressiveness does not mean aggression. He persists, but if she keeps resisting his advances, he will just move on.

Such a masculine quality is just immensely sexy to a woman! To the feminine psyche, no other quality comes close to masculine boldness:

Not your muscles nor your appearance;
Not your Ferrari nor your display of wealth;
Nor your good job, nor display of social standing;
And certainly not how much “gentleman” you are.

There are other qualities, such as leadership, which a woman actively seeks in a man, but it is the subject of another post. For today I will be writing about masculine boldness.

The bold, sexually confident man

A girlfriend of mine once complained to me how such and such men are “womanizers” – meant in a negative way. To me! When first I met her, I took her smoothly to bed on the same day in a matter of three hours. In the three years prior to meeting her, I had been in about 100 dates with 100 girls. You can hardly be more womanizer than that. And when I “womanized” her, she loved it.

But what she really meant was, these men are womanizers not properly womanizing.

Don’t let women fool you when they say “oh, men only think about sex”. When they say that, they are talking about the men who are not congruent – i.e. sending a mixed, inconsistent message. Typically:

misrepresenting their intentions, or even plainly lying, in order to get in their pants;
trying to hide their sexual intent;
trying to buy their way into sex;
or displaying masculine boldness, while at the same time displaying neediness, which is inconsistent
etc…

What they are complaining about is the lack of honesty of these approaches. What these men say is not consistent with what they do, or how they act. Because of this lack of congruence in words and attitude, they are signaling that they are not the real deal. They are just putting on an act!

Women have the important function of reproducing the human species through careful mate selection. They are driven by their sexual instincts to create and nurture life. And as such, they absolutely love a bold, sexually confident man – if he is congruent and properly calibrated.

In fact, they love it so much, that they are screening for masculine boldness from the very first instants of their interaction with a man.

“Not sexually aggressive? This must be friendship”

Consider these cases:

The man has been turning around her for months but never even talked to her;
Or he has been on multiple dates with her without making a move;
He invited her alone to his home. They chatted, laughed, had a good time, watched Netflix, maybe even kissed a bit. But he didn’t dare to attempt sex.

In all three cases, the man is not displaying any level of masculine boldness. He just didn’t dare.

In the first case, she has seen him around all the time and he never tried to talk. Even if he started to talk to her now, she has already ruled him out as a bold masculine man – mostly. It is going to be extremely hard for him to change this first impression. This, even if she was initially hoping for him to make the first move!

In the second case, the man is extremely slow and way too cautious with a woman who is clearly interested in him (heck, she showed up to multiple dates!). She is starting to think that “he doesn’t like me this way”. She is starting to think (more or less consciously) it’s because she’s not sexually attractive to him – no kidding! At this stage, most women will react with some degree of resentment for the man who make them feel this way!

In the last case, this was a moment where sex was supposed to happen naturally. It didn’t. Again, she will think “he doesn’t like me this way”, but her resentment will be even larger. He most likely will never have another shot. You cannot afford to take her to a place where sex is supposed to happen, and not attempt to have sex with her.

Is she actually consciously thinking this way? Probably not. The majority of the time, this will actually be an unconscious thought. She will just be aware of her feeling that “she doesn’t view him in a romantic way”.

In all three cases, in the best case scenario, she is going to label him as “just a friend”. Worse case scenario, her disappointment will turn into resentment, she will block him from her phone and disappear. In all three cases, the guy called it on himself, by not making a move soon enough.

In other words, she unconsciously screened him out by gauging how fast he made a move on her.

How soon should you make your move?

Most probably sooner than you are comfortable with.

That girl in the supermarket gave you a hint of a smile? You should approach and talk to her right away. In ten minutes, it will be cold.
You caught a glance from that pretty woman in the bar? Here again, you should approach and talk to her within minutes.
That cashier girl feels flirty? You need to firmly put the dialog into romantic territory right away.
In your social circle, you have a flirty woman giving you eyes? It’s not going to last long. You need to make a move within the first three times meeting her. The flirty situation will normalize very quick.
You are taking a girl on a date? Simply by showing up to your date, she has already made you know she likes you. This needs a happy conclusion in bed, very fast. You’ll be fine with a move on date one or two. On date three, it is already becoming harder. Beyond that, it will no longer depend on you anymore. It is going to be up to her – and most of the time this means bye bye.

Sometimes, the window of opportunity is just transient. In any case, you need to move faster!

Women’s tests

When you are first having views on a woman, you are running against a clock. If you don’t make a sexual overture soon enough, you will be soon classified into the “just friends” category. This means:

You should open a dialog with her very early after first noticing her;
You should put the interaction in sexual territory very soon after engaging dialog with her;
And you should move from dating, to actual sexual relationship as early as possible.

Fail to do that quick enough, and your chances of success are rapidly going south. I’m not saying it’s completely impossible, but it just becomes much more difficult to succeed.

You can view this clock as an unconscious feminine test to screen the most sexually aggressive man.

Some other typical tests

But now, consider some other typical tests a woman will throw at you.

Not answering your messages right away
Stealing away leadership from you: “I will let you know…”
Getting you to do typical feminine things, such as taking you to shopping
Constantly asking for gifts and favors and help
Disrespecting you
Etc…

How you react to these tests will tell her volumes about your sexual confidence.

What she is really doing is, she’s checking if you are going to submit to her whims, such as, for instance:

Lose your cool if she’s taking too long to answer
Let her steal the initiative of interaction and potentially derail it
Let her treat you as a female friend, and strip you of your manhood
Downgrade yourself as a useful man, rather than sexual man
Fail to establish clear boundaries of how she’s allowed to behave

A big part of why you might cave in to such tests is because you want to be accommodating out of fear of losing her. And that would be because you have no alternative option at hand.

If, however, you were a bold, sexually confident man, you could quickly replace her with another woman if it came to that. If you are not so afraid of losing her, it will be much easier for you to respond to these tests the right way.

Interestingly enough, the purpose of these tests is to check that you have other sexual options.

No matter how much women say they want committed relationships, what they are really screening through their tests, are sexually aggressive men who constantly fuck plenty of girls. That’s the irony of female psychology.

Not convinced yet? Consider the sexual market place.

Just ask yourself why there is such a thing as a “ladies man”. Such a man keeps seeing three or four women on a regular basis, plus some occasional here and there, over long periods of time. His women highly suspect, or know for a fact, that he is getting some “side activities”, yet they keep staying with him. Such a man has no problem at all getting a new woman in bed.

On the other side of the spectrum, you have what is called “involuntary celibates”, or incels. They will stay for years without a sexual relationship. It is extremely hard for them to find a woman.

If you have 0 woman, it is extremely difficult to get one. If you already have 4, 5, 6 women around you all the time, you can have more flocking your way every month, even every week.

Women like the men that every other women like! How ironic is that?

And these men are typically the sexually aggressive men.

“But… Most men are not sexually aggressive and end up in a marriage anyway!”

Of course!

The men openly displaying this masculine boldness quality are perhaps 15% to 30% of all men. Yet, the others still end up married or in a relationship anyway. So, without this quality, a man will eventually get a partner, anyway.

But consider bold, sexual confident men who easily end up sleeping with 100 women or much more in their lifetime. The more girls they sleep with, the more confidence and boldness they get, and the more girls keep going their way. Men like this are just attracting girls like magnets! Women will fuck them, no matter what, even when they know they are seeing other girls on the side. They are just driven to these men, by their deep instincts!

But not all women will be able to make such a man settle in a relationship.

And once they throw in the towel, they will turn to the next best option: the normal, stable guy, who at least can provide to their safety and financial needs. A guy they can easily control, and who will give them a family, and will be a good husband and dad. A good man, certainly, but not nearly as exciting as the bold, sexually confident man. And in any case, her best second choice.

Ultimately, after the dust settles, there will be a woman for each man, more or less.

So yes, you do not absolutely need to be sexually confident as described here, in order to settle with a woman. But it will take you much longer, you will spend a lot of time alone, and you will go through many unsuccessful dates, before you get there.

And then, sorry to say, it may very well be that she was the one choosing you, as her second best option, when her first choice was impossible to tame into a relationship. For the anecdote, I woke up myself one day to a divorce and wondered, in hindsight, why did my ex-wife even married me in the first place. The more I think about it, the more I believe what happened is exactly what I just described.

Never again!

And now some good news

Here it is: you can emulate the behavior of a bold, sexually confident man. You could view “game” as a set of guidelines designed to emulate this behavior and elicit a favorable sexual response.

And even better is this:, as you start to accumulate experience and confidence, this behavior will ultimately become you! To the point where you no longer need to emulate it, and no longer need to “game” a woman. You have successfully internalized the right set of behaviors to succeed naturally. No game is needed when it is a learned behavior that flows naturally.

I know it, because I went through this myself.

I personally do not necessarily advocate a player lifestyle as the final objective, per se. In the end, it is all about getting better relationships. Yet, getting some serious Seduction experience was still very beneficial to me. And it should be beneficial to you, dear Reader, as well:

Overall, you become much more attractive to the opposite sex, and get more attractive girls as a result
You get better at screening the right women for your life
You become sexually experienced, and women will appreciate that
With your deeper insight into female psychology, you can better manage your relationship with her

Better couples, and better relationship management. This is a good thing to have in these ages of sky high divorce rates!

Conclusion: where to start?

The best way to emulate masculine boldness is to push yourself to move faster than you’re currently comfortable with:

talk to her as soon as you notice her
propose a drink to that flirty girl in your social circle, as early as you can
aim to migrate things from date to bed, on date one or two.

Anything you do which shows you have balls, will impress her much more than a whole evening of bragging about your achievements. Masculine boldness is your friend. The prudent, careful approach, however, will almost always work against you.

The other thing to do is to own your sexual desire. The guy who dreams to fuck this girl, but tries to hide it from her, comes across as creepy. The bold, confident man is comfortable with his physical desire. You are a man, nature gave you a strong sexual drive for a reason. Don’t be ashamed of it, accept it, own it, and do not hide it.

Finally, you have to be the one making the first move. Most girls won’t make the first move even if they have a crush on you, and realize that a big part of that has to do with screening you for masculine boldness.

For more details, I suggest, dear Reader, that you take a look to my Seduction series linked below.

Yours,

The Doctor