The past year, and objectives for the new year

By | January 14, 2019
new year 2019

On the occasion of the new year, I usually like to spend time reflecting on the main events that has shaped my life in the past year, what I have learned from them, and how to put them in the perspective of the coming new year. I am also used to set myself some personal objectives – challenging yet realistically achievable. Making these objectives public, and following up on them, is an excellent way to make yourself accountable and move on with your life. So today I will take the chance to start my first Journal entry on this online blog, with my personal reflections on the past year, and objectives for the new year. So… what happened to me last year?

2018 in review

Professional developments

The diplomatic crisis and blockade that befell on Qatar in 2017 had one major consequence in my life: the level of activity in my job had come to almost a standstill. This meant a lot of idle hours at work, day after day. Good enough that I wasn’t laid off, as happened to many expatriate people working in this country.

Well, good news coming my way: in late 2018, this situation was ended and my work became all of a sudden as busy as it ever was before the crisis. I find myself occasionally working late in the evening, or coming to office on the weekends… But very happy to do so. It feels good to be useful again.

As a consequence, there will be some change in plans. I am not going to retire from my current career yet after all. It is a good and well paid job, why not enjoy it a little longer (and save more money).

Another consequence directly affecting this blog: I won’t be able to post as often as I initially intended to. A good post takes two to three days to write – but there are other things in my life. Posting once a week like I initially thought I would, is no longer realistic.

Family developments

I am a divorced father of two, and my children mean everything to me. I believe they need to see their dad, and they need to learn something from their dad. In 2018, I managed to see them a total of two full months, which is better than previous years, and is great from my perspective. In spite of the separation, I am trying to be present in their lives. From that perspective 2018 was as good as it can get.

Women developments

Another development in 2017-2018: the level of activity in the dating apps here in Qatar dropped considerably, and the social activity in the bars and lounges I like to go to, dropped as well. Was that another consequence of the diplomatic crisis? I don’t see an obvious link, but the fact is that the timing coincided with the crisis. Thinking that in 2015-2016 this country was actually a dating paradise!

Simultaneously, I became frustrated with the quality of the sexual relationships I was getting from my existing “rotation of girls” here, and just stopped to see them altogether.

As a consequence, I stopped trying to get girls in Qatar, and focused on traveling abroad instead.

It meant that, all of a sudden, I was no longer seeing anybody here. That coincided with a very busy period of my life, very active at the gym, plus working on setting up this blog, plus the time with my children! So I was not really missing seeing a girl here. Whenever I wanted to enjoy myself, I would book a plane and travel and get girls there and have fun!

My super sexy Kenyan woman

I have yet to start posting a series on the women who mattered in my life. But the fact is that in 2017 I met a beautiful and insanely sexy woman in Nairobi, Kenya. The time I spent with her was always very enjoyable, and she kept elevating the amount of testosterone in my blood. Every two months I would try and fly and meet her there.

That was contrasting with the low quality and quantity of women I was getting in Doha.

So I naturally started to expect more of it, and was hoping to outgrow our cool, casual relationship into a real boyfriend – girlfriend thing. But that proved out difficult to achieve from a distance. I am planning to make a full, separate post on my story with her, but long story made short: shortly after we met for the last time (in October) she texted me to announce that she was going back to her previous boyfriend – and therefore ending us.

I am not too concerned about that. She may well be back the very next time she fights her guy – women being women :-). But I learned one essential thing from this:

Relationships are the realm of women. The demand for a relationship should be coming from her, or not at all. So as a man, you should let her worry about that, and focus instead on keeping your girl “well sexed”. That is what masculine men do and that should be your only concern.

Other women

I nevertheless got a few other women in 2018 in Doha, without much effort – the “easy pickings”. There was nothing too exciting to mention here, nothing that stick anyway.

I also traveled two times on my own, once in the Philippines, and once in Kenya, and each time got a few girls, and a lot of fun. Seduction is always easier when you travel!

In total I got 11 new girls in bed this year, and been with a total of 14 different women (including girls I met in previous years).

Health

Health is another thing that really matters to me. I am soon to be 50 years old, but I look much younger than my real age (5 to 10 years younger). I am in a good condition, and I want to keep myself in good condition for as long as I can.

Reading the “Rogue Health and Fitness” blog was absolutely influential in this. The author of the blog convinced me that keeping a fair amount of lean mass was the way to go to defer the effects of aging. The earlier you start, the better.

Another huge motivation was a realization, late 2016, of my own self complacency in this domain. “Not bad for a man of my age”. Nope, man. There was a lot more I could do!

This was anyway my initial motivation to start weightlifting in 2017… But I made another very good move in 2018, when I switched from mostly isolation, dumbbell exercises, to heavy barbell weightlifting, compound exercises. I started exercises such as squats, deadlifts, barbell rows, bench press, and made them the principal of my workout routine, only going to dumbbells as occasional complementary exercises.

I combined this with a tight control of my diet, monitoring my macro-nutrients and calorie intake day by day.

The net effect was a drop from 22-23% body fat, to about 17% today, a gain of probably 5 kg of lean mass in 2018, on top of a 3 kg gain in 2017. Today, I am physically in better shape than I ever have been since my early twenties.

But I can do more!

Objectives for the new year

In the past, I have found it extremely helpful to write down my objectives for the new year (instead of having vague “new year resolutions”). Making them public will force myself to commit to them.

The key is to have ambitious objectives, yet realistically achievable, and then review the progress throughout the year. By monitoring which objectives are on track and which one are lagging behind, it allowed me to keep focus and prioritize my time between them.

Doing that, I have been able to achieve many of my stated objectives. Even getting 75% of a list of ambitious objectives, is in itself a valid achievement.

Blogging

This blog is my toy project: because I enjoy writing, as well as helping other people with whatever personal useful experience I can share… and I simply want to get exposure to blogging. So this year there will be more blogging.

To start the year, this post will inaugurate my new “Journal” section. I hope it will interest you, dear Reader, because this section is going to be the most personal, where I write about my life events and objectives and achievements.

I will also, at some point, start my “Travel” section, and write more posts in the “Health” section. Plus, of course, many more contributions to the “Women” section. In total, I am aiming to write at least 20 posts here in 2019. Or about two per month (given that I have two months of time off per year).

This is already quite ambitious!

But if I can find additional time, here is a last blogging goal. The Money section here doesn’t really fit in the theme of the blog. This is because I always wanted to have a professional blog about money management. But I didn’t want to start that professional blog without prior experience. That step is past now… So in 2019 I will launch my professional, money management blog.

Women

I need to get my Seducer focus back to Doha. The “Girlfriend from a Distance” experience didn’t work. In addition it seems that things are getting better on the dating scene in this country. It makes much more sense to get back in touch with dating here.

By “Seducer focus back to Doha”, here is what I mean precisely:

Get at least 6 new women from Doha this year. That doesn’t include “returning girls” (with whom I already had a sexual relationship prior to 2019). Given that I am unavailable to dating here 3 months in the year, that leaves us with 6 brand new girls in 9 months. To be on the safe side, I must aim (initially) to get one new girl each month.

This is very doable, but will require me to push myself out of laziness and complacency, and be a little more aggressive.

As I am still panning to travel, and that my most exciting experiences occurred when I was traveling, I still want to get more girls from my travels.

In total, I am aiming to get at least 10 new women this year, of which at least 6 from Doha.

Social

I need some social objectives as well.

In the last two years I involved myself into many side activities, and got distracted and lazy, and neglected to maintain myself a minimum of quality social time in this country. Being very much of a lone wolf, and comfortable with being with me and myself, I can very easily fall to this extremity if I do not pay attention. I would, however, benefit from being a little more social.

Social objective one. Going out on my own to a place conducive to making social contacts, at least once a month. Being alone is actually much better to meet new people.

Social objective two. Going out with other people at least once in a month. This doesn’t include the dates I should get with my new girls.

Putting everything together, I should be going out at least once a week. It may not sound much, but bearing in mind that I’m also going to the gym three times a week, mostly in the evening, the picture is actually realistic. And if I start seeing a girl on a regular basis here, it may actually become very busy!

Travel

I need to travel to new cities. In the past couple of years, I got a habit to travel mostly to (i) Cebu, Philippines, and (ii) Nairobi, Kenya. I have to add new destinations. Some ideas:

  • Dumaguete, or another “less touristic” Philippines city;
  • An Eastern Europe city. Possibly Kiev, Minsk, or Prague…
  • Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.

My objective is to discover at least one new city this year.

Health

The focus in 2019 will be on fat loss rather than lean mass gain. I am aiming to go to 15% body fat, or below. It is actually more difficult than it appears, are we are now talking about my stubborn fats that have been around my waist for 25 years. In addition I want to lose fat while still maintaining my current level of lean mass (at least).

The second priority will be to increase my lifts. For reference, my current best lifts are:

  • Deadlift: 130 kg for 3 reps
  • Squats: 100 kg for 5 reps
  • Barbell Row: 75 kg for 5 reps
  • Overhead Press: 40 kg for 5 reps
  • Bench Press: 65 kg for 5 reps
  • Dumbbell Bench Press: 52 kg for 8 reps (26 kg each hand).

Summary of 2019 Objectives

Blogging objectives:

  • 20 new posts
  • Travel and Journal sections
  • Launching my professional Finance blog

Women objectives:

  • At least 10 new women, of which 6 from Doha

Social objectives:

  • Go out on my own in social places, at least once a month
  • Go out with other people, at least once a month

Travel:

  • At least one new city this year

Health:

  • Getting to 15% body fat or below while maintaining current lean mass
  • Increase my lifts

The progress versus these objectives will be reviewed at least quarterly, with recommendation for action. Barring unforeseen adverse developments (such as the crisis that befell on this country in 2017…), in which case these objectives would be revised.

I give you, dear Reader, an appointment here three months from now for the first assessment of these objectives. In the meantime I wish you a very happy and successful new year 2019!

Yours,

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